Confession: I've never finished a Final Fantasy game. Not even VII (I once got to Gold Saucer). In fact, I've never finished any JRPG; something about the systems, the style, or some other aspect of the things just never clicked with me. A few have come close; Final Fantasy XIII, once I worked out what the hell was going on, but that was cut short a mere 28 hours in when my PS3's hard drive failed, and I've never worked up the energy to start again.
But, despite my own lack of synchronicity with JRPGs, they're one of the juggernauts of the "hardcore" gaming community, so I keep coming back, thinking that maybe this one will finally let me in, allow me to glimpse what it is that everyone else seems to love so much.
Based on this demo, Final Fantasy XV will not be the one to let me in.
Final Fantasy - particularly the later entries, as far as I can tell - loves the concept of in media res; nothing gets a JRPG going quite like starting mid-story, flinging names and concepts at you and just expecting you to keep up.
The Platinum Demo opens with main character Noct falling unconscious for reasons we're not privy to, then waking up in a dream world as his younger self, accompanied by the crystal-horned fennec fox (for some incomprehensible reason called a carbuncle?) that's pictured at the top of this post. It's kind of a Navi 2.0, feeding directions and tutorials via Noct's cellphone, all the while chirping incessantly for attention.
At the end of the game, you get to name the carbuncle; I called mine Chirpy Bastard.
The main purpose of the demo seems to be to show off the engine; circular pads scattered through the three areas allow you to change the time of day or the weather, as you navigate Noct's dreamscape to find a way back to consciousness, defeating monsters along the way.
Navigating is an exercise in frustration. Noct is twitchy as hell, and his jump is awful - he kind of floats up a few feet, then slams back down less like he's falling, and more like he's being pulled by an aggressive, invisible arm. The camera is even twitchier, and the whole experience of moving around made me feel frustrated and more than a little nauseous.
Combat isn't much better; hold a button to attack repeatedly. Using the D-pad switches weapons on-the-fly, and flicking from a sword to a giant mallet, or flinging particle-heavy fireworks, can vary the pace a little, but it's hardly exciting. Even the final boss - where you finally get to step into the shoes of an adult Noct, who can teleport between grapple points for some reason, isn't really very exciting.
It all looks pretty enough, in a fakey kind of way - the lighting is impressive, as are the aforementioned weather effects, but the whole thing has that slightly-too-crisp edge that seems to define Japanese games.
I'm sure there are plenty of people out there who can't wait for the full game, but I can't say I had fun with this slice of it.
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